My God Wouldn’t Do That!

Immediately, the two major religions in the world, Christianity and Islam, are having a seizure at just the title of this article. In monotheistic religions such as these, there is only “The God.”

Well, my Islamic and Christian friends, there have actually been more than 2,500 gods of worship identified with the human psyche for at least 60,000 years. (Christians, make note of the additional “zero” in that statement).

More than 2,500 deities - from the more ancient gods of polytheistic societies like the Hittites, Sumerians, and Mesopotamians; to the more contemporary gods of your major monotheistic religions following God, Allah, or Yahweh.

More than 2,500 deities spanning thousands of cultures; just a few being the African peoples, Native Americans, Greeks, Germanic Tribes, Hindus, Celts, Shinto, Aztecs, Buddhists and many, many more.

There’s Abellio, the Tree god. Abellio was a Romano-Celtic god worshipped in the Garonne valley of southwestern France and thought to be associated with apple trees. In all of my research, I have yet to come across anyone committing acts of terror in the name of an apple tree.

There’s Hotei, a Japanese god of luck; one of seven gods of good fortune known in Shintoism. To the best of my readings, I cannot find a single incident of anyone trying to legislate away a woman’s private right to choice in the name of Hotei.

There’s Nebo, the god of writing and wisdom known to the western Semitics. I cannot recall a single incident of any grown man enslaving, raping, and marrying a veiled, 9-year old girl in the name of Nebo.

There’s Behanzin. Behanzin is the Fish god known to peoples in western Africa. There are no stories to be found of parents refusing medical treatment for their child in the name of Behanzin; or in the name of fish.

There’s Chibirias, a Chthonic earth goddess of the Mayans, who among other things is known as the patroness of weaving. Although the Mayans left us a long time ago, nothing in historical texts suggested that they ever demanded a tribal member string their rebellious teenager up to a loom and stone him to death in the name of weaving.

In fact, there are more than 2,000 more examples of gods who, as documented by their followers, stood for nothing of violence or oppression. (There are a few exceptions). Rather, they stood for simple things like personal reflection, lakes, corn or rain.

Nobody is running around infecting ideological chaos on the rest of the free-thinking, conscious society in the name of corn or rain.

On the other hand you have followers of Islam who claim a loving religion, while they kill each other and everyone else in the name of a god that commands them to enslave their women, mutilate the bodies of those who don’t believe, and stone the victims of rape. This site has a wonderful list of the hateful context of the Qur’an.

*Hypocrisy clause: The Qur’an, 24:2 “The adulterer and adulteress, scourge ye each of them with a hundred stripes (lashes). And let not pity for the twain withhold you from obedience to Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the last day. And let a party of believers witness their punishment.”

That interests me, because in cases of rape and adultery among the Muslim faiths, we never hear stories of the men being lashed as their great book would command, but the women surely and disgustingly take a beating. It’s also interesting that Allah would take such exception to adultery, but promise the men of his faithful 72 women upon their assent to him. Seems a bit duplicitous.

You have followers of Christianity who claim such righteousness while they themselves commit blasphemy against each other for their many different interpretations of a singular text filled with so much contradicting hate, love, justification, and oppressive narcissism. There are of course many websites that point these out, but this one is among my favorites.

*Hypocrisy clause: The Catholic Clergy, the largest sect of Christianity, take a vow of celibacy; which apparently has a clause that makes an exception for sexual acts with young boys in the confessional booth. (While at the same time, the same clergy pontificate the “abomination” of homosexuality).

This book might be one of the best I’ve ever picked up. It’s a little pricey if purchased brand new, but you can likely find a used version at a local book store or book exchange. It contains about 2,500 questions you can pose to those dogmatic pontificators of such loving monotheisms.

All of the gods in this book make for great stories, but the overwhelming majority do not have such an abundance of ignorant and asinine characters in their manuscripts as the fables of the faithfully monotheistic do.